Tiger Hills - A Review

Sarita Mandanna’s debut effort in the literary world spawned interest that was unheard of in the Indian literary world of late. Her effort has invoked the highest price for a debut novel by the very reputed London based Penguin book house. The wait is well worth it as Sarita Mandanna has spun a tale like no other. The novel is teemed with post Victorian influences in the exposé of the complexities of characters and the turbulences of human emotion.

A native of Coorg Mrs. Mandanna has delved into the intricacies of the land and actualized the land as the main character itself. It makes me yearn for the undefiled salutary land that Coorg once was home to. The picturesque means in which Mrs. Mandanna has painted Coorg makes me homesick staying hardly a 100kms away. An outsider reading this book would probably feel like a tourist lured and never wanting to leave this land. An aspect of this book that brought me great pleasure while reading the same was the means through which the bio- fauna and the attributes & lore of the martial race of the Coorg’s have been bought forth.

It is a story that spreads itself across three generations from 1860’s to 1950’s. It is an expose of the cultural connotations of the land in the ages of colonial power and provides an insight into the generation of my forefathers and their way of life. As I moved through the 400 odd pages it made my chest swell of the pagan culture that we harbored. My pride was basically caused as a result of the intrinsic means through which the Coorgs connected to their environs.

I do not want to paint a picture of the story so as to spoil the thrills of it as most reviews would. I believe, not conceitedly, that it is a good read and would give a valuable insight into how an agrarian society evolves into an accommodating one with it not being a standalone society but an influenced one!

GENDER DISCRIMINATION AND AN APOLOGY

What provoked me to write an article about gender discrimination and female infanticide? My sister!! She has always been on my case about me receiving preferential treatment from my parents. I have always been nonchalant about it; naturally so as I was at the receiving end. But recently my mum remarked that I was a spoilt brat and my sister has always received so little of their attention and despite that has been an achiever. My initial reaction was I had not asked for it? Was I to blame? Giving it more thought I remembered how I used to demand attention and throw a fit if I did not get it. One instance I clearly remember was when my sister was not well and she could not attend school, I took a stance saying that if she didn’t go I would not too. So my mum packed us both off to school. I do not think she has still forgiven me for it. All my cousins and aunts have always lavished attention on me as I was the only son and my dad was also the only son of 7 siblings. But it wasn’t the same with my sister she always got subpar treatment. She sometimes got so distraught that she actually used to wish she could grow a ‘DICK’!!

The Indian society itself is a patriarchal society by nature. Even when we talk of the heydays of being a woman in India, the role of women was primarily to look after the man and the carrier of the lineage. An irony is some of the heralded women of the ages gone by had macho attributes in their personality. It is by honing these attributes they were termed to be great. They are often called great because they treaded onto the male domain to impose themselves. Why does a woman have to be compared to a man to highlight their greatness? In talking about the view about women a very saddening trend has emerged in India of late especially rural India. Pre birth sex determination India is rampant and a lucrative business.

Women are such an integral part of our lives. We cannot live without them right from the day we are born. A woman brings us into the world, bathes us, feeds us, sings us lullabies and does all our dirty work. As we get older she consoles us, delights us, talks us to us when we get sad, angry, irritated etc. as we hit puberty their roles change; our first crush, our first kiss, the first love and culminating in the sanctity of a marriage. We would do anything to woo them to win them over. And then suddenly the spark is gone. We start taking them for granted; we do not need them anymore not as a daughter not as anything. We are suddenly convinced we can make do with a male society. We do not need women anymore. A son is suddenly of primordial importance. The heir to all our family culture, the man who will be the quintessential ‘baap ka beta’ . The son who will show society what the family is all about and keep the light shining on the family legacy. The saddening part, even the women in the family favor the idea. In rural India it is more practical in nature as a woman can only marginally add to the income but a man is much more productive. The maintenance cost of a woman is very high as there are a lot of cosmetics cost, make up, an array of clothes and jewelry to provide and of course dowry. When a girl is born in the family they have to start saving right from the beginning as the bridegroom’s family will expect gifts. And also there is the added responsibility of keeping the street leeches away from your daughter. It adds up to quite a burden as opposed to a male child.

How do we change this social stigma? The most obvious would be education. Talking about education I actually came across a very well respected and educated couple from Mysore who resides in US who went all the way to Bangkok to get a sex test done. But education is important and we will have exceptions and is the way to go. The lifestyle for women in rural India must be made better or on par with the male productivity. It is already being done with the microfinance companies encouraging borrowing and entrepreneurship. Abolition of dowry must be made stringent. The theatre’s showing soft porn should be made to show hard porn too and get more of these theatres in rural areas, legalize porn. Those desperate males will have an outlet for their frustration at least. The ideas may be a bit radical, but it seems the only way to go. Cheers to a bright future for Indian women.

SORRY SISTER, IT WAS LONG DUE!!

AGRICULTURAL MNC’S AND ALCOHOLICS: AN INSIGHT INTO VALPARAI

A few weeks back me and two friends rode into a quaint and pre colonial hill station called Valparai. The town has very minimal tourists and is a haven for people who enjoy self exploratory trips and would definitely put the overrated Ooty to shame. The station is filled with a lot of tea estate holding companies who mainly export their produce. We were acquainted with a certain Mr. Abhay of Tata Tea who was courteous enough to let us stay in his house.

I was pleasantly surprised with the amenities provided for his designation (assistant manager). He had 3 people to look after his household chores, a gardener, a sweeper and a cook. All his bills right from electricity, phone up to his fuel (100 ltrs quota) were all taken care of. What’s more his CTC was around 22-25k; this seemed like my dream job. The initial infatuation faded as 3 pegs of whiskey went down with the sun. We got talking about his hobbies and how he killed time. Alcohol, phone calls, clubs and parties amongst the managers ruled the roost. The lifestyle seemed like a desperate attempt to negate boredom. The only real hobby seemed to be photography, which I noticed was prevalent amongst all the estate managers. It then occurred to me that the offered lifestyle was a legal bribe the agricultural MNC’s were onto to pave the way for people accept a lonely job. Speaking to the HGM in a party a few days later, my doubts were confirmed when he said the most important criteria in selection was if a person was disposed to a lonely life in an estate. Speaking to other managers some of them told me they started consuming alcohol only after they joined this job. When I suggested to them about such a wonderful opportunity for them to save money, they burst out laughing. They blew up all their money on alcohol and parties! Every alternate day they have a party and take turns hosting it. Their capacity for alcohol was also incredible; most of them could down a bottle easily. All the women who were married to the estate managers taught at the local schools for a paltry sum of money. They loved the parties too and were excellent hosts and conversationalists.

After a few days at Abhay’s house we went to meet the manager of Bombay Burma trading company, Mr. Prashanth. A lot of these estates have their presence around South East Asia and Africa as Mr. Prashanth informed us. We got to look around the tea factory. The wage scheme followed here was really a piece of work. The workers were paid daily wages until 3 in the evening and they could work if they wanted to after that for extra wages; so at an average they earned about 200-250 Rs a day! No wonder looking at the net I found that Valparai was ranked about 7th in the wealth index of India. They seemed to have struck quite a balance between employers and employees which is quite unheard of in India. Later on we visited another assistant manager Mr. Aiyappa. Being a close friend of mine from Madras Christian College more dark sides of the job were revealed by him as he spoke of backstabbing, laborers trying to scare him and of course rampant alcoholism. Knowing my personality it really seemed like a suicide mission in taking up this job.

I left Valparai with a really heavy heart but fully aware which job would best support me if I ever plan to write a book!!

Hayavadana

I recently decided to see a play at the Ranga Shankara theatre in Bangalore out of sheer boredom. It turned out to be a real interesting evening. I went in not expecting much, but boy was i surprised? The Ranga Shankara is Bangalore’s theatre supreme and is managed by Mrs Arundathi Nag. The theatre is an ode to the erstwhile actor Shankhar Nag. He was a man of many facets as seen in his oeuvre. He is amongst a few select people who have won national awards for acting (Ondanondu Kaaldalli) and directing (Accident). The Ranga Shankara premises are excellent and it is a true propagator of theatre to mainstream audiences as manifested by their ticket prices, Rs 50 and even better, the hall was air conditioned! What was even more remarkable was the punctuality and discipline maintained in the theatre. They started right on time and intervals were initiated with bells and there was no entry to all the latecomers. Brilliant, considering our attitude of swalpa adjust maadi!

The play was titled ‘Hayavadana’ and was written by Girish Karnad. The play was punctuated by some belligerent performances from the production house, The Benaka group. To give a brief outline of the play, it was the story of two friends; one a Kshathriya and a wrestler named Kapila and the other a learned Brahmin, Devadutta. They end up falling in love with the same woman, Padmini. Suspicion and drama climax with both of them ending up committing suicide at a Kali shrine. A distraught Padmini is saved of her suicide attempt by the appearance of Kali (A special mention to the actor who played the uber cool Kali). The two men are brought back to life by Kali, but with their heads transposed. Both men are extremely joyous at the result, much to the relief of Padmini. It seemed like they both desired each other’s strengths so much that they were least bothered by the absenteeism of their initial strengths. Kapila becomes Devadutta’s body and Devadutta becomes a wrestler and a man of knowledge. I could not understand why Kapila was celebrating as he lost his wrestlers body and gained the body of a Brahmin. It soon was clear that it was for Padmini, Kapila’s argument being she should go with the body of Devadutta rather than the head. An enraged Devadutta dispels Kapila with his swanky new wrestler body and they walk away to their house leaving a distraught Kapila; who goes into exile. The rest of the play focuses on how the bodies gradually transform to match their heads and how Padmini is left with discontentment. A parallel plot is also in the play, the story of a Hayavadana, a half horse half man who yearns to be complete. He finally becomes a complete horse rather than a complete man!

This play is the embodiment of incompleteness and fallacies, from all the characters involved. The title of the play is actually of the sub plot than the main play, an attempt to show fallacies exist in all facets? The differences between the two friends are brought out well in the initial part of the play. They both are very much human and incomplete as they are shown appreciating each other’s qualities throughout the play leading on to jealousy and suspicion. Padmini’s character that seemed to be shaping up well also exposes her inadequacies when she lusts after Kapila after the heads are transposed, culminating in her going to find solace in Kapila. Lord Ganesha is also brought on in the beginning of the play, a symbolic gesture in the play of the lord’s shortcomings as well, because of his elephant head and human body. The play of transposing heads actually implying transposing realities. The play poses a question as to the conflict we often face if to go with our head or our body characterized by Padmini’s dilemma, her choice of the head is in trend with social dogma of our times. The play also highlights man’s go-getting attitude to better oneself in spite of his limitations, as manifested by how the bodies adjust to their heads after being transposed. The comic relief was provided by the two talking dolls and Padmini’s son essayed brilliantly by some cute tots.

The style of the play was audience involving and very different from western theatre. It drew a lot from rural theatre. The play was laced with folk songs, although the lyrics were tough to understand. It was a narrative style wherein the Bhagavatharu (narrator) poses questions to the audience and involves them with the characters and the complexities they face. There seemed to be a lot of Yakshagana style music and dance involved in the play. Another dance form was the Byalata style. All in all it was an excellent play, production and evening made prolific by two of Karnataka’s theatre stalwarts. Thank you Mr Girish Karnad and Rangaguru B.V. Karanth!!

ART IMITATING LIFE OR LIFE IMITATING ART?

Convention has always dictated that ‘art imitates life’, i.e. until the 18th century English literature maverick Oscar Wilde propagated his anti-mimesis theory. He was the first advocate of the ‘life imitating art theory’. He based his theory on the belief that the theory is “not merely from Life's imitative instinct, but from the fact that the self-conscious aim of Life is to find expression, and that Art offers it certain beautiful forms through which it may realise that energy”. I am not going plot a differentiation between platonic realism vs. romanticism in this article, I merely quote Wilde to prove how right he is in the Indian context of ‘Bollywood’.

The argument of life imitating art or art imitating life is one of the common arguments baffling critics. One of the few instances one can convince a declaration on life imitating art is in our own Bollywood. Not just Bollywood but Indian cinema. The Indian cinema is so deeply embedded in the Indian psyche that people believe what happens on screen is the reality around them.

The way we treat our heroes and villains is testimony to that. They are not just actors as the emotion of the protagonists and the people are entwined in Indian cinema. There have been instances of people hating the character of the villain so much; Puneet Issar who injured Amitabh Bachan on the sets of 'Coolie' could not find work for a long period of time because of the accident. The instances are numerous; the government seemed convinced when they banned smoking on screen. They thought kids would be influenced by the heroes smoking on screen. By actually banning it, the bad boy image that goes with smoking was glorified even more. Just take a look at a typical Indian cinema, it is romanticism and senseless idealism, the attributes are plenty in this context. The stereotyping of social classes is plenty, and the dances, where do i even start? The censor board actually censors what is realism and keeps the fantasy part of it on the reel. The dances are laced with jhatkas and matkas of the heroes & heroines; subtle and not so subtle indications of what they want to do to each other (licking their lips, thrusting their pelvis all over the place, biting the tongue and lips to show how strongly they feel for each other) CENSOR THIS! From such movies stems the perfect anti hero on the Indian street. The guys think if they make catcalls the girls will find a compliment in it somewhere, like the regional movies. Indian cinema has shown time and time again that perseverance and aggression is the key to get a girl. How many cases have we heard of women/girls being raped because the boy liked the girl so much that only he should have her? What does he do? Rape her! A tainted girl will obviously want to marry soon enough and given the Indian male’s hypocrisy for virgins, he is the alpha male she has to choose ( Raja ki aayegi barath). The portrayal of Indian women has traditionally been weak too albeit a few films, that were critically acclaimed.

I am not generalising Indian cinema to just life imitating art, it is just excessively found to be so. There are wonderful cinemas that have portrayed art imitating life too, especially in the recent decade. The multiplex era has appreciated the Indian intelligence and grown in stature ever since. But they seem to have been looking westward for inspiration, inspiring a new argument. ART IMITATING ART?

What the f***'s a BLIMP??

A blimp is defined as a nonrigid airship that depends on internal gas pressure to sustain itself in the skies. It came about during the late 1920’s as an anti-submarine patrol airship for the British royal navy. It was commissioned off of the navy by the 1960’s. Since then it has been used in America as an advertising tool. The outdoor sports advertising era for the blimp began with Goodyear which still use this in the America’s cup yacht race.
This technology is well over 80 years old and has served its purpose all over the world. But the IPL seems to have been a renaissance stimulus in the life of the blimp. In every match you can hear the commentators have a go at what they deem to be some wonderful technology. What exactly? The commentators never say, do they? SMG recently even said something to the tune of MRF being a technological leader in bringing this technology to India. I hate to break it to you SMG but the IPL blimp isn’t even a blimp. A blimp is used for observation purposes and also for aerial shots. This is where the technology lies and both the technologies aren’t being addressed in the MRF blimp. This blimp doesn’t even move. It is tied down to a motorable vehicle on the ground. There is a word already for such objects. It is called a ‘balloon’. The blimp is nothing but a floating balloon with a sponsor’s name. It seems like a full circle for MRF which started as a toy balloon manufacturing company back in 1946.

Coalition Poltics

A democracy represents a system of governance where in an ideology & the power of the people is bought forth by an elected representative. The idea of a democracy is in granting power to the people & the exercise of this power is done by an elected representative. Coalition governments in India have undermined this trait by compromising ideologies in pursuit of power. The obvious question would be if a coalition rule truly represents the ideology of the people, as it is fundamentally engrained to do. The rise and influence of coalition politics is indisputable in the Indian political scenario henceforth. There is no doubt that it is here to stay albeit some glitches that could curtail smooth governance.
One of the biggest disadvantages of a coalition is instability due to conflict of interests. During the Indo-us nuclear deal, there was a lot of anxiety in the Indian political diasporas. The vulnerability of a coalition government was exposed when the left withdrew its support in the standoff with UPA on the nuclear deal. Soon enough the opportunistic Samajwadi party stalwart Amar Singh jumped onto the coalition bandwagon. This had Mukesh Ambani twiddling his fingers as he knew his brother Anil’s proximity to Amar Singh. A chain reaction ensued as Mukesh arranged a meeting with Manmohan Singh seemingly to protect his interests. This made news all over as his actions weren’t hard to read. It invoked a reaction from Amar Singh too as he proclaimed he would push for a tax on private oil refineries in the country, which could seriously curtail Mukesh’s expansion plans. This has set up a dangerous precedent in the Indian scenario. In the words of Paranjoy Guha Thakurta, a political commentator, it was the case of “The tail that can wag the dog”. The effects of Singh’s declaration was a fall in Mukesh’s stocks & it turned even more bitter when Mukesh stopped Anil’s Reliance telecommunication from merging with MTN stating his permission was required for the deal to go through. Amar Singh called Mukesh’s act disgusting and flexed his new found political muscle by asking the PM to interfere. A small regional party was having a tidal effect on the Indian political and business scenario. This does not augur well for a developing country like India as it shows politics and business are entwined. It reflects poorly about the country’s image to the rest of the world and possible investors. Since then there have disinvestment policies that the government has failed to carry out bogging down to pressure. The PM seems to be protecting party interests rather than act at the behest of our country’s development. Coalition parties in developing countries do not augur well for our development. Everyone only needs their slice of the pie and serve their self interests.

But averting a coalition government is no easy job once we decide that it is a hindrance in development. The decision is in the hands of the people and this fundamental trait of democracy has to be respected. One of the ways I think it can be avoided is to curtail the formation of regional political parties. Parties are mushrooming all over India in the name of religion, caste, creed and of course the opportunists. Such narrow minded splitting up of the Indian proletariat and bourgeois does not adhere well for the populace. For instance Baba Ramdev launched a political party stating he wants to cleanse the political system and get back money from banks in Switzerland which he in turn believes will automatically make India a superpower. That is actually his basis for forming a political party. There was news item wherein people of the gay and lesbian community wanted to form a political party because they are tired of being misrepresented on TV. Do you think we should blame them for having such short term motives? No, cause the election commission doesn’t care too much. So, why not have your own political party? We also have to get down to improving the quality of votes. In permitting only the educated to vote will wipe out nearly half the vote bank. It will only result in increasing the discrepancies between the rich and the poor, with the rich getting richer and the poor getting poorer. A better option would be to increase the present voting age to 21. It will definitely improve quality as a lot of graduates would come into the fold.

To change the onus is on us. Convention alone doesn’t dictate what is right. Just because people break a traffic light we should not take it for granted and do so too. We can show alternate paths to people by being pro-active ourselves. You might not stop everyone but someone might just become aware that he is at fault and some others might even follow your lead too. I do hope we can change and inspire others to change. The idea of a democracy is to place power within us. We can get rid of this menace in our country and elect a responsible government only if we believe. ‘VOTE RESPONSIBILY’.

Memorable Quotes

In our lives we often come across some great quotes. Some have an everlasting effect on us. Some quotes strike us purely because of their intelligent quotient and others because of their profound personal effect. I am truly grateful to have come across some quotes that have had a great influence on me by some real ‘wise’ people. Here are a collection of quotes that has been engrained in my memory:
• Travelling is the best education a man can get.(Anonymous)
• If you have to enjoy life, being fit is necessary.(Vikram Muthanna)
• People change with time.(KUP)
• Even a rapist can be nice; for the few minutes you spend with them.(KBG)
• No matter the magnitude of a persons achievement, he is human.(KBG)
• Before each meal ask yourselves, 'have i earned this'? (KNK)
• The best fertilizer a planter can provide to his estate are his own footprints.(KNK)
• You have to care about society, not have society care about you. (KKU)

INDIA & ORGANISATION

NAISSANCE(SDM-IMD Inter collegiate fest) What did it mean to me? Three days of getting pissed drunk and....... yeah pretty much it. I was advised to get involved by my seniors, said it would be quite the learning experience. There was no debating that fact. I tried being involved in the sponsorship part of it. It was quite disastrous; we literally had to beg people without any bargaining clout whatsoever. Everyone from college was unleashed on the streets of Mysore; it was reminiscent of India’s CWG fiasco in terms of lack of preparation. It was all last minute. We were desperate. Soon the blame games began. I could not help but indulge myself in this, as i sometimes love to impress upon people my pseudo brilliance. The seniors blamed the staff, staff blamed seniors, juniors blamed college; on and on.

What is it about Indians and making a mess of whatever we put our hands in? On a recent trip to Cambodia i saw a board highlighting India’s involvement in the restoration of the Ta Prohm temple. Asking some local about it he said something to the tune that money promised had come very late and the work rate was very slow. There are numerous instances of us messing up. Two year’s back Field Marshal Sam Maneckshaw passed away. The audience to see him off was paltry and none of the heads of state were present. President, prime minister, leader of the opposition, chief minister, chief of any of the armed forces including the defence minister no one was present. Sam Maneckshaw was one of India’s two field marshals. If it was a film star or a politician there would have surely been quite a number of people from the political elite clout. This is the sad state of affairs of our country. A man who put his life on the line for our country gets below par treatment on his final chapter. There have been numerous instances of us messing up in various facets of administration, law, etc. The worrying part is when we pride ourselves on finishing up the mess we ourselves created.

In talking about the CWG screw up.; I remembered about the Sydney Olympic Games, the authorities of the games actually thought the city would go into post games depression on completion of the games. So, what did they do? They actually organized fairs and festivities thereafter slowly phasing the festivities out. They did this thinking abrupt ending of the games would affect societal working thereon. This is what development and forward thinking is all about. This is exactly what differentiates great organisers from mediocre ones. The difference between a developed nation and a developing one is clearly illustrated here. We can only talk about being a permanent member of the UN, being a superpower by 2040, being the fourth country to send a manned mission to the moon blah blah blah...... What purpose does this all serve? It is internal development we should be focussing on rather than our portrayal and image building of our country to the world. We still have more than 300 million people who are below poverty line in India. Our healthcare sector is still sub-standard. Aren’t these issues that have dealt with immediately?

Un-Sociable networks

Human beings have a tendency to advertise themselves, to be seen, heard etc. The rise of social networks only cements this fact. In 6 years these sites have taken centre stage in the lives of millions of teenagers. I am often asked if i am on any one of these sites. I doubt if i'll ever be. I'm sure the advantages of being on them is plentiful. But am i missing out on something by not being on these sites? I don't think so. My cousin says facebook is for people who can't make friends in real life. Ironically the man has a facebook account. When i asked him about the mismatch between walk and talk, he said he did it to look up on people. A stalker. I did find it interesting enough and using my sister's id i checked up on a lot of people thereon. Each profile seemed to reflect who the person wanted to be than who the person was. Some of them were plain pretentious. I know 'who am i to pass judgement on people', right. But it's my fuckin blog. I am not going to write about the obvious threat of paedophiles, sex stalkers, recently in india even kidnappers. They way i see it people start living two lives one virtual and one real. Nothing wrong with that. The trouble is when they find it easier to live the virtual life. There are kids who are as young as 8 on facebook. I dont know if they have an active social life. Chances are they do. But they might take solace in the virtual world than deal with the tougher reality. I actually came across lot of instances where people would not say a face to face hello but would send friend requests on social networking sites. There is something really wierd about that. They probably couldn't face rejection in reality so they go the virtual way. I truly believe that these social sites will have a negative effect on building social relationships and inter-personal relationships.

Another ill effect would be to cocoon yourself into a groupthink. By groupthink i mean there are so many groups in face book, orkut etc. When you are part of such groups you vision, creativity is narrowed. There exists prejudice in belonging to such groups, you tend to be peer influenced and subscribe to dogma. It is nice to find someone else who listen to Belle & Sebastian on these sites. But i find it also nice to enjoy something by meself also & discover stuff on my own.

I recently came across a site where you can commit virtual suicide by 'killing' yourself on this site. This stuck me as quite stupid. Is it necessary i make a drama of a simple act of deleting my profile. It seems like the internet has succeded in making people feel like celebrities by indulging in celebrity like behaviour.

They call it social networking but oddly it has made people more doleful and unsociable to their immediate environment.

Does A Sinner Break Roots From Being Sinned?

Of late i seem to have come to a realization about this trait of mine i.e taking advantage of people who are 'close' to me. It did come under scrutiny previously from my friends, but i did not bother me then. It seemed to be lurking in my sub-conscious and the trigger effect happened one night drinking tequilla and having chocolates from this girl i was least bit interested in. I did not want to be there but i was. Lo and behold i was in convalescence mode. I kept wondering what shaped this intrinsic attribute. Surely i wasnt born like this, was i?

As i kid growing up in Coorg i was in a hostel at a real young age, i did not know what to make of the place as i was nearly 4 yrs back then and having no experience of such a gamut of social interactions. I was real naive and i thought the best way to survive was by adopting a people pleasing behavior. And boy was i wrong ,i was fleeced of my chocolates, my food etc. My end of the bargain was never met. Then there was this instance in school where i was framed for something i had not done. Then there was this other instance(s) where this boy from my neighborhood would make me steal biscuits from my own home.YEAH!HELL YEAH! I HAD BEEN USED!

This was intrinsic, could i say a lot of other people developed characteristics the same way as i?? Sure as hell yes, aint it? Everyone's personality is shaped by their life incidents. As to how much , it really can't be measured. In nature you see how some plants have tap roots and some others have fibrous roots. Pulling out a tap rooted plant is very difficult.They grow really deep into the soil making it nearly impossible to pull them out.In a garden we often see how dandelions grow right back up after we uproot them. It is because the tap-root would still be embedded in the ground. In contrast fibrous roots are easily dealt with as any gardener would tell you. I talk about this on a thought about how the bad experiences of our life are like the tap roots, they shape our personality. They are the one's that deeply influence our character. A lot of our learning happens from the worst years of our life. I am not denying the part played by those happy days, but i wouldn't say it made me what i am today. Those hard times that i have gone through in life are what stands out for me in my personality. It necessarily does not have a positive course but the influence would definitely be much more profound.